I just want to apologize in advance for what I’m about to put you through. I am about to test everything you love and know: food from your favorite restaurants. Just remember, any restaurants mentioned here should not be discriminated against—we all have bad days. Plus, each individual restaurant serves purely as an example to make us laugh, cry, and choke back gags. I present to you: 10 of the grossest and most uncomfortable restaurant horror stories I could find. Hopefully, I’ll see you on the other side.
1. Poor Grandpa
So I’m guessing plastic triangles aren’t the new salsa?
2. Long Story Made Short
“My friend and I went to PF Changs for her birthday two years ago and it was me, her (Jannah), our friend Sloane, and her little brother who was like 7 at the time. Our server like never came to our table and when he did, he gave us completely wrong drinks, bread plates that had someone else’s leftover food on it, and got mad when we told him he didn’t give us what we ordered. Then after like 20 mins of him not coming back with the right food, we asked another waitress and she told us he never placed a second order for us. Then when it was time to tip, my friends weren’t going to give him anything but i felt bad so i was gonna leave like 12%. Then as we were leaving he ran in front and we assumed it was to open the door for us…he closed the door in our face. It was OBVIOUS that we were leaving and even another server walked up and was like omg I’m so sorry lemme get that for you. So I walked… back to the table and took the tip back. THEN (not even kidding you) we left the restaurant and he legit RAN UP TO US LIKE 800 FEET FROM THE FRONT DOOR and started to like cuss us out about how we were little b*****s for not leaving him a tip. and when we went to go speak to his manager, he literally held the front door closed so we couldn’t get inside. then we watched the manager fire him. but it was wild AF.”
– Madi Mila Bryce Duvernay on Facebook
I have so many questions. What happened to this man? What kind of day was he having? How are you going to serve plates with someone else’s food on it? I just want to talk.
3. Taking Protein to Another Level
I’m not sure if they were trying to do her a favor by adding some extra flavor, or maybe they just plucked the squash out of the backyard right before they served it? Either way, the idea of bugs in my mouth makes me want to avoid squash at all costs. (Or maybe I can just use it as an excuse to swear off salad?)
4. Yes, That Is THAT Bad
“Idk if this is even like THAT bad or what ur looking for …but I went to Wendy’s one time and there’s was literally a piece of the pan inside the eggs”
– @annikaapearson on Twitter
Have you ever tried scrubbing a stain off a pan? It’s literally impossible. Imagine the actual pan scrubbing off. I feel whatever process there is to cook a food should probably never include anything that would lead to A PIECE OF THE COOKWARE BEING PEELED OFF THE PAN INTO THE FOOD.
5. Double Whammy
I’m sorry, but have you opened an umbrella indoors recently? Spilled some salt? Do you own a black cat? We need to figure out what mirror you broke, because apparently your seven years of bad luck is running hard right now. I would just avoid restaurants all together until 2024.
6. Baked Bug
The saddest part about this to me is thinking about this bug. I can’t help but imagine its thought process. Maybe it thought it was going to get its sauna on, or have a little spa day? RIP to that bug; you went out doing it big.
7. Excuses, Excuses
Honestly, this might be one of the greatest comebacks of all time. Using the fact that they don’t use pesticides, which is probably why people are attracted to their restaurant, to excuse a huge, winged bug in a meal? I almost believe you, Malibu Farm. I almost believe you.
8. Lies and Lactose
“I once ordered yellow curry from a thai place in venice and they lied about the coconut milk and put real milk and I[‘m lactose intolerant] so [I got so] sick that I was crying and almost had to pull over on the 405 because of my intestinal distress”
– @ksiewert12 on Twitter
This translates to me as a lawsuit. So many things could have gone wrong that would have been all because they lied to you. My suggestion? Go back, order the same thing, throw a fit, and then threaten to either sue or have a free lifetime supply of Thai food WITH coconut milk. It’s a win-win.
9. Butterfly(ing) Steak
“one time i was eating at Larsen’s that steak place and there was a strand of hair going THROUGH my steak like one end and out the other. you could pick up the steak by the one strand and like swing it around that’s how deep it was. now i have trust issues
– Chiara Carmela Diona on Facebook
Here, I’m not really sure which part concerns me more: the fact that the hair got all the way through the steak, or that the hair was so tough it didn’t break. What products was that person using for their hair? Is that coconut oil? I don’t blame the trust issues though, I’ll never trust steak or hair again.
10. Surprise from Above
“My friend was eating at an Unami burger when a dead rat fell from the ceiling (the ceiling was exposed so it had pipes and air ducts and stuff running through it)”
– Lorenzo Sampson on Facebook
I actually can’t even attempt a funny caption for this. This is just 100% disgusting. Probably one of the worst things I’ve ever heard.
Well, I don’t know about you, but this has officially ruined my loving, working relationship with restaurants. And hair. And plastic. I’ll be cooking homemade meals in my microwave for the rest of my life, thank you very much.