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we ate and power ranked every single cheesecake at the cheesecake factory there are 34
we ate and power ranked every single cheesecake at the cheesecake factory there are 34
Lifestyle

How to Have the Ultimate Cheesecake Factory Experience, According to the Cast of Friends

This article is written by a student writer from the Spoon University at JHU chapter.

Eating at The Cheesecake Factory is a life experience everyone should have. It’s hard to resist the family-friendly atmosphere, half-off cheesecake deals, and enormous portions.

If you’re like me and excitement gets the best of you, you can be found shoveling food in your mouth until you end up feeling so full, you skip the best part: Cheesecake.

So here’s how to eat strategically so you can stroll out feeling like a champ:

Know what you want

GIF courtesy of giphy.com

You should always have at least a general idea of the type of food you want. It’s easy to get lost in the massive, 17-page long menu. Knowing whether you want steak, tacos, burgers, pizza, pasta, or maybe even a salad from the Skinnylicious® menu could save you (n)oodles of time.

The faster you order, the faster you can eat.

Drink water before going

giphy

GIF courtesy of giphy.com

Resist the temptation of reaching for that plastic cup handle. Trust me on this one. This might be one of the less intuitive methods on this list, but make sure you’re hydrated before you go.

Studies have shown that drinking water can fill your stomach, making you less hungry. Guzzling water while trying to eat all your food will make you feel bloated and give you that extra push towards giving birth to an actual food baby.

Go with friends

Gif courtesy of wordpress.com

GIF courtesy of wordpress.com

Go on a date with that special someone and take advantage of the dim and intimate ~mood~ lighting. Go with a group of friends on your birthday (and get free ice cream while you’re at it). Go for happy hour with coworkers. The options are limitless.

Friends, friends of friends, more than friends — this step is pretty self-explanatory. More friends, more food, more fun.

Don’t go overboard on bread

giphy

GIF courtesy of giphy.com

Five words: Warm honey wheat black bread. Out of all the delicious types of bread out there, this one takes the cake. This bread is the perfect mixture of sweet, soft, oat-y goodness, and nearly impossible to resist.

If you manage to accomplish this step, let me know how you did it — I’m still trying to figure it out.

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cheesecake factory

GIF courtesy of giphy.com

Don’t be a Joey. Get appetizers, entrees, drinks, and desserts to split with the table. Plates of food don’t need personal space.

Pair this step with Step 3, and you have yourself a wider variety of food to eat. Go forth and multiply (your options).

Get cheesecake to go

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GIF courtesy of giphy.com

At The Cheesecake Factory, you can’t not get cheesecake. It’s a rule, I promise. Give in to the creamy texture and those classic flavors plus seasonal ones like the pumpkin pecan cheesecake and the peppermint bark cheesecake (brb, drooling).

Let’s face it — no matter how well you stuck to the steps above, you probably had to undo the button on your pants to let your tummy breathe

#SpoonTip: Hide your undone button by putting your table napkin to good use.

That being said, take full advantage of the fact that your server can and will put your beautiful wedge of cheese and cake in a convenient, little box that you can take home. Amazing. With these steps, you can always have your cake and eat it too.

Ashley studies Writing Seminars and English at the Johns Hopkins University. She's a lactose-intolerant dairy lover with an affinity (read: irrational infatuation) for ice cream. Her life goals are to own a corgi with a pudgy butt and to be insta-famous (holla at @ashleysojin).