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Lifestyle

The 8 Stages of Thanksgiving, as Told by Bridesmaids

This article is written by a student writer from the Spoon University at Tulane chapter.

Thanksgiving has finally arrived. This is a holiday that is meant to be spent with those who you love and are truly thankful for and should be filled with lots and lots of food. If your pants aren’t busting open at the end of the meal, you did it wrong.

Naturally, the Bridesmaids cast accurately depicts the 8 stages of Turkey Day and the true feelings we know you all have:

1. When Thanksgiving guests start to trickle in. This is the moment you’ve been waiting for.

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Let’s get this party started.

2. But then you realize mom sat you next to your annoying grandma.

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Crap.

3. Food is on the table, nothing else matters, and all bets are off.

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If you lose a finger, don’t look at me.

4. You take that first bite of your meal and you’re just like:

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It’s like an orgasm in your mouth.

5. You are simply inhaling your food and you think you can handle it.

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Your eyes are obviously bigger than your stomach.

6. 10 minutes later, you sit on the couch with your pants unbuttoned, and you suddenly realize your stomach is NOT okay.

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Shit’s. About. To. Go. Down. Literally.

7. When everyone is still in your house, but you really need to re-evaluate your life after thinking about what you just consumed.

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GTFO, people.

8. Finally everyone leaves and you get the rest of that pumpkin pie for yourself. Time for round 2.

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Mhmmmmmmm.