The earliest memory I have in the kitchen is with my grandmother during Christmas time, making dozens of different kinds of cookies to stuff into tins and pass out to the entire family. I come from a family mixed with Italians, Croatian, and Polish recipes, and growing up, these cultures were brought to us through treats.
My personal favorites were Kolaczkis, a puff pastry cookie filled with fruit jams and dusted in powdered sugar and Potica, a flaky strudel stuffed with a sweet cheese, nut, or tapioca filling. As a young girl, it took lots of practice to roll and fold the dough over just right, and I remember my grandma and aunts coaching me through each step. I would sit and watch my mother for hours spread butter through each layer of dough in her secret Potica recipe, fascinated by how they do it. These memories shaped my love for food and showed me that food is a way to share love. Being a witness to generations of women cooking together, carrying on their family recipes is an honor, one I hope to continue..
In reflecting on these memories, I realized that it’s the women in my family who year after year keep special traditions and recipes alive by showing the next generations. Without these women, all the tips and tricks that make these recipes perfect — what the best fruit jam is for Kolaczkis or what the secret to Potica is — would be lost. The women are the ones who rope in a new generation to continue these traditions. Without it, these recipes may never be made again. The importance of passing the torch lies in the hands of our grandmothers and mothers, and making these dishes is a way to honor and celebrate the women before us and the women to come.
One of my greatest friends and fellow Purdue University student, Kylie Viveiros, is the epitome of a cooking enthusiast. She mills her own flour, makes traditional Brazilian desserts for every party we have, and cooks up a detailed and delicious-smelling meal night after night. She always makes traditional recipes from her culture, and in talking about where she learned everything she knows, the women in her life were at the top of the list.
“After my parents got divorced and I moved in with my dad, dinners were sometimes unbearable to eat, being flavorless, boring, and nothing like how we remember it,” she told me over the phone. Her first instinct was to turn to her grandmother, who “taught her some staple recipes that they would experiment with.”
Lucia Papalia, another one of my closest friends, always brings us plates of leftovers to school from her Nonna’s house over the holidays. She is a Hospitality and Tourism Management major who dreams to work in the restaurant business. For her, it’s not just about making these recipes for the ones she loves, but incorporating her Nonna’s teaching into her career.
“I was always surrounded by food growing up, my Nonna’s house was the place everyone gathered to share an array of delicious recipes every Sunday,” she told me. Papalia became obsessed with trying new things. “I was praised for being an adventurous eater as a kid because I would be willing to try anything and everything,” she continued.
Kolaczkis and Potica are hands-down the most important part of Christmas to me, and learning how to make these treats is essential to me. As I get older and can’t spend as much time in the kitchen with my grandmother and mother, I feel a responsibility to take the skills I have learned throughout the years into my own kitchen so I can one day pass it on.
“Growing up, every Easter my cousins and I would stay the night at my Nonna’s to make Easter bread,” Papalia said. She explains how her Nonna gave them creative freedom with the patterns in the braids. “Easter wouldn’t be the same without this recipe and I look forward to it every year.”
Viveiros’ favorite recipe was also the first one her grandmother taught her, Camarao a Mozambique, a shrimp dish cooked in a spicy garlic broth with lots of Portuguese flavors. It has become a real staple in her household for busy nights. “Our main way of bonding is cooking together,” she said. “It was nice to have her full attention and be able to learn all her little tips to perfect the recipe. Since I go to school so far from my family it helps me to be less homesick.”
Family recipes are more than just dishes served at holidays or gatherings. They are ways to “combat home sickness and still feel close to my family,” as Viveiros explained, ways to cook a quick meal to bring nourishment to our bodies, or, eventually, ways to give “the same experience to my kids and grandkids as I had,” as Papalia said.
The women in our lives are the reason these food traditions stay alive. Without their time and patience in teaching all their tips, these recipes could be lost forever. They fill our tables and stomachs while giving us a sense of home. Passing down these recipes is not just for learning how to cook, it is to build community in families. By understanding and respecting the recipes taught to us by the women in our families, we are not only keeping the food alive, but the spirit of those who made it for generations to come, and we owe a lot of what makes the holidays special to the women who make sure that first bite brings us home every time.