Hanger (hunger and anger happening at the same, unfortunate time) can bring out the worst in a person, especially when provoked. The Bison caught me in a hangry mood and got me thinking about all of the horrible things that have happened and will most likely happen again.
1. Catching a glimpse of the cashier’s screen that says you have $10 left in your account.
“Mom and Dad, I’m really sorry that the cup of pineapple I ate today costed more than an actual pineapple itself. I’m also sorry that I ate three of them. Oh yeah, and I am sorry that the rest of the money went towards some fro-yo and 3 pounds of candy.” Whoops.
2. Walking in at prime meal hours and there’s not a single open table.
Don’t worry, I’ll just go sit in the student space and try to balance my plate on my lap with this Management 101 coalition.
3. Being hungry before 10:30 am.
Oh, you want breakfast before brunch hours because you have class at 8 am? I’ll see you in the caf. You don’t have caf swipes? Maybe I have a Sustain bar in the bottom of my backpack I can give you?
4. Wanting to eat something with protein in it, and it costs extra.
You want grilled chicken in your pasta, burrito, stir fry, quinoa or couscous? That’s going to cost you more, sorry. If you want chicken tenders in that wrap instead of grilled chicken, that’s going to cost you more too. I’m a growing college kid… No one understands.
5. Getting a turkey burger instead of a veggie burger.
My vegetarian roommate has a lot to say about this, but none of it’s appropriate to put in writing. This dilemma pretty much applies to any mix-up order; it can just ruin your meal.
6. Forgetting your BUID.
Cashier: “Here, please fill out this card with all of your personal information and receive glares from the endless line of people behind you.”
7. Realizing corn has been the vegetable of the week 4 out of the 7 days.
Although the corn is delicious, you probably want something with a little bit more nutritional value and substance. Well, maybe tomorrow?…or not because tomorrow we’re having corn…again.
8. Being the weirdo who wanted a Pepsi product.
They don’t just make Pepsi people. Why do you think finding a Gatorade or some kind of Tropicana juice is like finding Bravman at a Super Saturday?
9. Someone who is most certainly not you steals your order.
Why? Is your name Elizabeth? We had class together first semester freshman year I know it’s not Elizabeth.
10. Craving a little fro-yo, but the flavors sound like the names of Yankee Candles.
Do you think Blueberry Cobbler tastes just like blueberries, or is there a hint of cobbler in there?
11. Wanting to eat cookies in unlimited proportions like the caf.
Wait, so I can buy three small ones or one big one? I can’t just have them all? What’s a harvest cookie? Ugh, I just want one of each and a few to take for later. The struggle is real.
Some things are just the worst: