As someone who wasn’t born into a family of non-vegetarians but found happiness in bites of barbecued chicken, I can vouch for the pains of my people. You may have nagging parents, a fussy room-mate, or a strictly vegetarian hostel accommodation — our tears are one, fam.
Here’s a list of things you’ll definitely relate to if your chances of having meat at home are medium-rare:
1. You’re sick of being told that paneer is better than chicken.
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
This is when you roll your eyes the hardest. The only people who can draw such conclusions are the ones who have never tasted chicken, amirite?
2. You lose your shit when someone compares soy chunks to mutton.
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
The only thing worse than no meat is imitation meat; and when it involves soy, imitation is far from a form of flattery.
3. Chicken-flavored noodles are your best friend (even though they taste nothing like the real thing).
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
Chicken-flavoured noodles — or chicken-flavoured anything, for that matter — are the blurred line between vegetarian food and ‘sin’. Even though they’re not very satisfying to your meat-hungry tummy, you can eat them without pissing off your parents (or your obnoxious roomie).
4. You often lie to your parents about that chicken burger you had on your way home from college.
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
It was a McAloo Tikki, maa!
5. Your folks use all sorts of persuasion to convert you back to the dark (aka plant-eating) side.
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
You might find yourself constantly facing arguments about animal-cruelty, reminders of the fact that you’re going to hell and articles about how eating anything other than pure-vegetarian food is harmful for your body and soul that your parents found on page 22 of Google search results.
6. You are not-so-secretly jealous of friends who have meat-friendly families.
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE HAVING MUTTON KORMA FOR LUNCH AND FOR DINNER?
*looks at own plate of daal chawal*
7. You’re always ready to finish other people’s meals.
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
It’s not a favor to them, it’s a favor to you. Your friends know who to find when they have too many kebabs on their plate.
8. You look forward to being invited to breakfast/ lunch/ dinner/ anything involving food at your non-vegetarian friend’s home.
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
The feeling you get when you realize you’ll be eating some home-cooked meaty goodness – it’s better than a hundred trips to Disneyland.
9. You ALWAYS order meat when you’re dining out.
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
It’s not like you hate vegetarian food, you just get enough of it back home. This is the only time you get to explore different kinds of meat dishes and you like to use it well.
10. You’ve had problems finding Hostels and PG accommodations because most of them are pure – vegetarian.
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
You’d rather just stay in the backroom of the local KFC.
11. You’ve probably also tried smuggling some good-ol’ meat inside one of these places.
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
And had the smell (or a nosy room-mate) give you away.
12. Your biggest fear is to end up with a vegetarian life partner.
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
Because your heartiest wishes include doing that spaghetti scene from Lady and the Tramp, and being able to have shawarma at home everyday.
13. Your mouth is watering just from looking at this GIF:
GIF courtesy of giphy.com
There may be tears in your eyes from the beauty of it. That’s something even the best of us can’t help but do — even if we’ve never had bacon.