Thirsday (thirsty + Thursday for you imbeciles out there) is the Michael Jordan of weekdays and the prodigy of the weekend. I would make out with Thirstdays if I could.
Quick side note: if Thirstdays were a dude they would definitely be John Tucker… not the initial JT — the noble JT at the end.
Back to Thursdays (Niki + Thirstdays FOREVER) I would make every day a Thursday if I could. (Not actually… only ’cause they would lose their magic.)
Here’s the kinda pixie dust mojo I’m talking about:
It gives you something to look forward to throughout the week.
Looking forward to Friday on Monday is like looking forward to summer in December. But looking forward to Thursday….
It speeds up the week.
Thursday makes the beginning of the week go by so. Much. Faster. You just need to get through Monday and then it’s basically Thursday because all you have left to endure is one more school day and then Thursday eve… This is the same type of logic you use in class while you’re staring at the clock: Okay, in 10 minutes we’ll only have 30 minutes left.
It’s time for a lil’ foooozball.
Nothing like a good bar and a good American football game. And Tom Brady.
It’s a treat.
Thirsday is technically part of the week, which seriously makes it better than Xmas. Awwwwww ‘reat.
It gets a crew a-formin’.
Thirsday crew = stoop kids on HGH and maybe a little meth.
You wake up (hungover — here’s some help with that) to a FRIDAY.
Breakfast in bed served by a naked Tom Brady isn’t even better than this.
It makes the weekend feel so long.
Friday feels like Saturday, Saturday feels like Sunday Funday and Sunday it feels like you should just keep going. #listentoyourheart
It brings you to the bars.
You’re most likely not going to bars Friday or Saturday. Thursday is the golden day to attend a fun college bar and get drunk with some locals who wish they were still in college. Not judging — that will be me next year.
It persuades you to skip homework via beer sales and maybe even some cheap food.
Bars need to incentivize to get kids out on Thursdays — think about all of that wonderful hw we could be doing instead! Nothing motivates me to fail my Friday morning exams/skip classes and most likely finish the semester with straight Cs more than cheap beer. Except for 50-cent wings… in the house, bounce.
It makes Friday classes a breeze.
Having a great Thursday night and then waking up knowing you just have to get through class and not do any HW is a figurative rainbow to a pot of gold fuckin’ tequila.