You know the feeling when you want to just reach through the television and pull out whatever mouthwatering dish awaits on the other side? We’ve all been there. That’s probably where all of the finger smudges on your roommate’s TV come from.
Now try to remember that feeling way back in the day, when our little selves had food nostalgia for the foods that existed only in our favorite cartoons and TV shows. Here’s a definitive ranking of the most nostalgic fictional foods that only 90s kids will understand, ranked from least to most desirable.
9. Proud Snacks from “The Proud Family”
Sorry Mr. Proud. Your snacks were infamously bad tasting and nothing about kiwi garlic and horse radish pork rinds were going to entice Wizard Kelly into buying them.
8. Pizza from “The Princess Diaries”
Mia, just because you can do things doesn’t mean you should. Even though Micheal Moscovitz plays in a grungy garage band, he probably doesn’t like his food to taste like absolute garbage as well. While the sweet gesture is appreciated, for everyone’s sake we hope you can run Genovia better than you can order a pizza.
7. Honker Burger from “Doug”
Touted as Bluffington’s Best Burger since 1991, it was the local hotspot for Doug Funnie and the gang after school. The burger joint famously only took orders in code, demonstrated by Skeeter in the pilot episode when he helps Doug to order “three moo cows, one no cukes, one no stinkers, one wet one, four tubers, and four from the vine.”
6. Mammal O’s from “The Amanda Show”
Where do we even start with this one? While as seven year olds we may have thought the idea of Mammal O’s was pretty nifty (hands up if you begged your parents to buy you a box at the grocery store), in retrospect we think its pretty gnarly. Keep your fuzzy creatures in your backyard, not in your cereal.
5. Good Burger from “Good Burger” and “All That”
Tell me you didn’t say that in Ed’s voice. It’s hard to speak to the desirability of the Good Burger because frankly they looked pretty average, but it’s in the delivery.
4. Sploosh from “Holes”
What did you say about Sploosh?!? – Zero (probably)
In addition to being a notorious highway robber, Kissing Kate Barlow was also a stellar food preserver. Those spiced peaches (dubbed “Sploosh” by our guy Zero) looked pretty good on screen, but I guess anything would be good if you’re running from the po-po and starving in the desert. Bonus: who can resist anything served in an adorable mason jar?
3. Pretty Patties from “Spongebob”
Oh pretty patties, how do we love thee? Let me count the ways. They match our purses. They remind us of home. Simply put, pretty patties rule. Plus there’s a flavor that makes your tongue glow in the dark. Sign me up for that.
2. Jawbreakers from “Ed, Edd n Eddy”
Since the main premise of this show was pretty much centered on Ed, Double D, and Eddy scheming the neighborhood kids out of a quarter just to buy these amazing jawbreakers, it made sense that they would make it this far up the list. Candy bigger than our noggins? AND only a quarter? It seriously causes food envy to this day.
1. Nacos from”Kim Possible”
The naco: a perfectly engineered food fusion of taco and nacho that we have none other than Ron Stoppable to thank for. And though we have never seen a Bueno Nacho in real life, you can bet your bonnet that it will be the first thing to order if it ever comes into existence.
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