Gritty, Squishy, Sticky — oh my. Any of these things sound familiar? They should, because they are some of the textures that people hate most about some of their favorite foods. If you’re one of these people, you might feel weird about this. You probably think, “Why can’t I get over this texture?” Think about it, you go out for cocktails and your friend offers you an oyster, you would love to eat it, but you just can’t stand the thought of a slimy mollusk sliding down your throat.
Or maybe you got a mixed drink and the bartender added some frozen grapes to add a little zing. You bite into it hoping for it to be soft, but instead you’ve got a gritty mush that tastes like a ball of watermelon with a wax coat on the outsideWhat other foods bother people, you ask? Well, you’ve come to the right place.
1. Passion Fruit
Who doesn’t love a tasty, exotic fruit that has a vibrant purple outside and a… gooey, seedy inside? While this might be a great essence in foods or drinks, eating it is not the most appealing thing in the world.
2. Cottage Cheese
You see it on salad bars, you see it with fruit on top of it, but what exactly is cottage cheese? It’s cheese curds that have been strained, but not pressed. It comes in several forms, too dry or too slimey. Some say that these curds are an acquired taste, but when you think about it, it can easily be manipulated into something tasty.
Black beans? marbles? Nope, guess again. Some might recognize these as none other than tapioca pearls (aka boba). These tasty (or not so tasty) pearls that you find in bubble tea or milk tea come from the same base as the pearls you find in tapioca pudding. Some people have compared them to the texture of eating animal eyeballs or chewing rubber.
This iconic vegan staple can be delicious because it’s basically an edible flavor sponge. So why do people have an aversion to this delicious meat substitute? Well, because it’s basically a sponge. But when prepared correctly in curry, stir-fry, or even fake bacon, the texture can easily be overlooked.
I asked a random person on campus, “When you eat oatmeal, what does it remind you of?” The response? “It’s like vomit.” The great thing about oatmeal? The texture can be a blank slate for a variety of toppings. You could add chocolate chips, nuts, berries, bananas, etc. You could even make your oatmeal taste like cookie dough. This texture can be easily manipulated.
Antioxidants, vitamins, minerals — the health benefits from blueberries are unreal, but so is the sourness and grittiness you get when biting into blueberries. Sure, they might be great baked into a cobbler or blended in a smoothie, but on their own? Some people just can’t get past that texture. The easiest and quickest way to bypass the texture is by blending them into a smoothie.
A classic Japanese delicacy, Sashimi is perfect for the fish lover in your friend group. But like most other forms of sushi, sashimi is completely raw fish. How can you stand the squishy, cold, and sometimes chewy consistency of this dish? If you can’t stand the thought of eating fish, and if it scares you, you might have Ichthyophobia.
At this point, you probably want to huddle up in a ball and cry. Or maybe you just want to go eat some Ben and Jerry’s for a satisfying texture that will comfort you right to sleep. Eventually, you will (hopefully) get over your aversion to these odd textures, but in the mean time just stick to soup… Or better yet, order a pizza.