We all have that friend (cough cough, me) that loves to go on and on about his/her coffee addiction. We get it, you love coffee and you can’t live without it, but please stop talking about it.
Nevertheless, when they go on their rambling session here are 10 things you will not hear them say:
1. “Can I have a pumpkin spice latte?”
Real coffee drinkers would never ask for sugar, milk or flavoring in their coffee. They like americanos with extra shots of espresso, please.
2. “I didn’t drink any coffee this morning.”
The only reasons they get out of bed in the morning is to start brewing that coffee and drink it. After this, the day can begin.
3. “I ran out of coffee in my apartment.”
They have backup bags of coffee for their backups. If there is ever a coffee shortage in the world, their apartment is the place to go to get your caffeine fix.
4. “I think you’ve had enough caffeine for one day.”
They hate when other people judge their caffeine-drinking habits, so they would never comment on others.
5. “The barista spelled my name wrong.”
That might have happened the first time, but they are BFFs by now. Also, they don’t care about the outside, they only care about what’s inside that coffee mug.
6. “Do you want me to throw away the rest of your coffee for you?”
Friends don’t let friends waste coffee.
7. “Starbucks coffee is amazing.”
If they are real coffee drinkers they appreciate the marvelous taste of coffee. They would much rather go to the local coffee shop they know serves killer Colombian coffee. They go to Starbucks for convenience, not for taste.
8. “That coffee was hella expensive.”
Coffee is the love of their life, and you cannot put a price on love.
9. “I made a terrible cup of coffee.”
They are pros at making coffee and were probably baristas in a past life. They simply do not mess up their coffee and they know all the secrets to brewing a perfectly caffeinated cup of coffee.
10. “Should I have another coffee? Nah.”
For a real coffee drinker, the answer is always yes to this question.