Being the presumptive Republican nominee can be demanding. But despite all the pressures of running for president, Donald Trump has managed to keep himself undeniably slim and svelte on the campaign trail. You may be asking, how does he maintain his flowing locks and radiant complexion all while tending to the ails of the American public? Read on to see exactly what the great American icon eats (and avoids) in a typical day.
1. Pair a Diet Coke with every meal
Diet Coke was made for dieting. We all know this fat-burning drink is crucial to any successful diet, and so does Donald Trump. In fact, the notorious health nut is known to down one or two Diet Cokes with every meal. And while you may prefer the sugary wholesome sweetness of a “regular” Coke, taking the diet option is one of the many sacrifices you’ll have to make if you want to mimic Donald’s silhouette.
2. Also, NEVER drink Diet Coke
Because Diet Coke makes you fat.
3. Don’t drink alcohol
The Donald doesn’t drink, and neither should you. He has spoken out many times against the dangers of alcohol, claiming in an interview with Esquire that drinking is worse than cigarettes. Besides, drinking will only make you say something stupid.
4. Avoid rice at all costs
It only supports the Mexicans and the Chinese.
5. Only eat the toppings off of your pizza
With a fork and knife. Like a REAL American.
6. Pack in the beta-carotene
Eat foods rich in beta-carotene like carrots and pumpkins. However, exercise caution. Excessive levels of beta-carotene in the bloodstream may cause carotenosis, or orange discoloration of the skin.
7. Say no to Oreos
After Nabisco announced that they were moving their operations to Mexico, Trump declared that he’s “never eating Oreos again.” Therefore, if you care at all about America’s great economic prowess, you should follow Donald’s lead. While you’re at it, ditch Hershey’s chocolate, Brach’s candy corn, and all other sweets that support Mexico’s economy.
8. Take everything with a grain of salt
Literally and figuratively.