It's a Friday night (and you already know where this is going). You and your boyfriend have been at the bar for a few hours and then, out of the corner of your eye, you see it. The look. The "we-should-probably-go-back-to-my-place-right-f*ckin-now" look.
Before you know it, you're in his room and he's struggling to take off your brand new Victoria's Secret bra and you're praying he doesn't break it because you just bought it and those things are not cheap. Then it's off, and you're good to go.
But just as you move in to undress him, you realize he's not exactly "ready" yet. And you can't help but wonder—did he drink too much or is he just not that into you? Did he not appreciate the $60 bra you bought just for this occasion? Ugh, men.
But don't storm out of the room just yet—because it turns out "whiskey dick" (or alcohol-related erectile dysfunction) is a real thing. According to one doctor, it comes down to two factors: the dilation of blood vessels and discoordination.
"Alcohol causes your blood vessels to dilate, which is why people’s faces get flushed. It affects the way the blood moves in and out of the penis, which is, obviously, important for erectile function," she says. Your impaired nervous system is also an issue when it comes to trying to get it on.
Unfortunately, the scientific research to support these theories is limited. In the most recent study by the University of Washington, sober men were able to get harder faster than those who were intoxicated, and in some cases, intoxicated men weren't able to get it up at all (sorry, dudes).
The reason there is little to no research on the "whiskey dick" myth probably has to do with the fact that there is no money to be made from it. One source states, "People who get funded to do sex research are often funded through pharmaceutical companies so they can claim ownership of something like 'the next female Viagra' or capitalize on a medical model."
Basically, they'd rather find a pill that can cure your whiskey dick and then sell it to you for the price of your firstborn child.
So what do you do when you're in the heat of the moment and his stuff just isn't cooperating? Unfortunately, there's not much you can do other than wait for him to sober up. You could have an in-depth conversation about your life goals, pull out the Nintendo 64 and throw on some Mario Kart, or just pull off your matching Victoria's Secret underwear because, hey, his mouth still works and you've been eating a ton of pineapple.