What you all have been waiting for: the dark truth about what really goes down behind the food Instagram accounts we all follow that make our mouths water and have us asking: where and how can I get my hands on that piece of food? As a self-proclaimed foodie and "foodstagrammer," I can attest to these habits foodies are victims of, with special attention given to those who run food-centered Instagram accounts.
This article showcases the food photography of some of the foodstagrammers I follow and believe have nailed the game, so you can thank me later for getting an inside access to some of the best food accounts you can follow on Instagram (or not, if you happen to fall into the trap of scrolling through their feeds for hours on end). The realities of the aesthetically-pleasing and delicious food photography accounts we all know and love are no longer swept under the rug. Grab some popcorn and keep reading to uncover the 10 things only food instagrammers can relate to.
1. Every meal turns into a photo shoot
Starting out with my own food Instagram page (shameless plug: @foodie.findz), foodstagrammers, including myself, use the phrase "Don't touch!" more times than we can count on one hand (two hands still doesn't even do it justice). Death stares are not uncommon, as everyone else at the table must wait for you to snap the perfect angle while the food sits waiting to be devoured.
2. Your camera roll is filled with food pictures
Rows on rows of food pictures fill your camera roll with various angles, backgrounds, and lighting effects. We hope that at least one of the hundreds of photos taken turns out to be a lucky winner and worthy enough to be posted on the 'gram.
3. Menu anxiety is real
Uncertainty and indecisiveness are common emotions that plague all foodstagrammers when it comes time to order at the restaurant. With so many options, but only one stomach, the anxiety hits hard in choosing just one item off the menu. Some foodstagrammers may try to sneakily persuade other members of the group to order their second or third choice to be able to still snag a picture and taste (not like I would know). Another angle is ordering multiple dishes just for the photo opportunity and saving the rest for later. Sounds crazy, I know, but we're talking about real, firsthand experiences here.
4. Lighting is everything
The heading says it all. Too dark? NEVER use flash photography—one of the biggest no-no's widely understood by the foodstagram community. Natural daylight is always the way to go, and that's a fact.
5. You become a photography snob
It seems as though others just don't get the craft and you are the only one who can get that perfect shot of the food. Whether it's a bird's eye view angle to account for details on the top or eye-level perspective to show serious depth, knowing how to take the right photo is key to giving the food the respect it deserves. Make sure the picture fits Instagram's square parameters because the white border is just not going to cut it.
6. If someone takes a bite of the food before you take the picture, rage takes over
Ah, finally, your long-awaited food finally gets delivered to your table. You have been planning this picture since last week when you organized this food date. But before you even have a chance to say, "Don't touch!", your friend takes a bite and ruins the one photo opportunity you had. There's no turning back now, and feelings of anger build up inside.
7. No matter how hungry you are, the food must wait for the perfect photo
Yes, I know it may seem crazy, but it's true. When the food looks Instagram-worthy and delectable, and the lighting is on point, hunger takes a backseat until the shot is captured for the foodstagram. Doesn't matter if it takes a quick second or five minutes, the food can wait.
8. Friends always go to you for advice on where to eat
Questions such as, "Where is the best place to eat in town?", seem never-ending, and at this point, you have all the answers on where to go for the best brunch, the most authentic tacos, the one traditional Italian spot downtown, or the best bang for your buck happy hour joint.
9. Stalking the restaurant's Instagram page and tagged photos beforehand is totally normal
If, and only if, the point of interest can pass the initial Instagram screening, it's a winner and deemed valuable enough to visit. This includes good-looking food photos taken at the location previously and the destination's Instagram profile or website.
10. You're always thinking about your next meal and how it can contribute to the foodstagram
Breakfast may be over, but what about lunch? Dinner? Oh, don't tell me you forgot about dessert. Every meal of the day is carefully and meticulously planned out to ensure another photo opportunity may crop up in the near future. Because if you can take anything away from this playful foodstagrammer profile satire, it's that we live to eat, not eat to live.