Seattle is its own little bubble of hipsters, coffee, and some delicious pho. Natives get used to the foodie routine after growing up with it. But what happens to those of us who venture outside of the bubble for college, all the way over to the other coast? Well, we’re hit with some harsh waves of reality, that’s for sure.
1. Saying “Do you want Dick’s?” doesn’t go over too well
In about third grade, every Seattleite learns that making jokes related to Dick’s is no longer funny. Besides, it’s the home of (arguably) the best fries and burgers on the west coast, so why joke about such a serious and important topic? The answer to Dick’s is always yes.
2. Dunkin Donuts is a thing. Like, a real thing
I mean sure, we’ve at least heard of the place, but it’s not popular in the Northwest at all. We know it exists, and maybe there’s one in Kent or Renton or something, but seeing one on every block is confusing and foreign. Why aren’t there five Starbucks stacked on top of each other? Am I cheating on Starbucks? Where’s Cafe Ladro? Not even a Stumptown?…Victrola?
3. Seafood isn’t quite the same
Ivar’s? Spud? Anthony’s? Nope. You won’t find any chowder bread bowls or fish and chips the way you’re used to at home. There’s something about Seattle seafood that just ruins Dungeness crab for you everywhere else. (Another Ivar’s classic that is sorely missed: the garlic fries. How can we get those mailed to us ASAP?)
4. You’ll miss out on the fair scones this year
Missing the fair is one thing, but missing those scones is entirely different. Is it the jam? Is it the bread? It’s certainly not the lovely Puyallup atmosphere. Whatever it is, we miss it. (Word from the wise: any attempts at homemade replication won’t taste quite the same.)
5. No, you can’t have cream cheese on your hot dog
A word of advice: it’s not common on the east coast to put cream cheese on your bun and you will get strange looks when you ask for it. So just keep that to yourself and save adding that topping for when you’re back home at Safeco. There’s a lot of other interesting things you can do with cream cheese if you really are craving it.
6. Seattle’s got some superior sweets
All right, even our ice cream is hipster. Sure, there’s some places that will offer some really great cupcakes, but do they have Whiskey Maple Bacon flavor at Cupcake Royale? Ice cream is pretty universal, but not much can top the Balsamic Strawberry with a fresh waffle cone from Molly Moon’s. And Top Pot’s Doughnuts are so sought-after that college students have been known to rifle through the dumpsters looking for scraps. (And with those maple bars, I don’t blame them.)
7. Honeycrisp apples are seriously underappreciated
Biting into most apples can instantly turn a day around, but there’s just something different about the honeycrisp. They’re filling, they’re healthy, they’re tasty, and your mom probably packed them into your lunch every day through middle school. Nationally, however, they’re not even in the top eleven most popular types of apples. More for us, huh?