There are many ways to live up to your full college potential. You can play a sport, you can join clubs, you can make the Dean's List, or you can consume your body weight in pizza.
We decided to go the pizza route.
The Rules:
1. Eat only pizza for five days straight.
2. All pizza must have some form of tomato and cheese to count.
3. Drink nothin' but water.
4. Hope to make it out alive.
Day 1
Mood: Eager Beavers
The best way to start this week probably wasn’t waking up at 8 am to go to the gym and then not eat anything until 1 pm, but we all make mistakes. Post-gym, Rachel went to class, leaving Liza alone to suffer and contemplate if it was worth it to order Domino's at 10:30 in the morning.
Lunch was great, we <3 pizza. We picked our seats in the dining hall based on where there would be good lighting (for snapping a photo) and endured the judgement of an entire dining hall as we sat trying to take Spoon-worthy pics of sub-par looking cafeteria pizza.
We also had access to SpoonTV—aka the best snapchat out there—for a few hours, so y’all got to see the bomb margherita pizza we ordered from Luca’s, one of our fave delivery places. Approximately 1.8K people also saw Rachel holding a pizza box while smiling like she won a million bucks, which is pretty cool.
The first day was a breeze, honestly, and we’re pretty sure this won’t be so bad, despite Liza’s grandma spending 10 minutes trying to tell her that this was going to be terrible for her digestive system.
Today’s Totals: Liza had six pieces of pizza and Rachel had four.
Day 2
Mood: Positive Outlooks
Still goin’ strong. This morning we both reheated some of last night’s margherita for breakfast and then finished off the pie at lunch time.
We also found out too late that they were giving away pizza in the campus center for lunch and we had to take a minute to mourn what could have been, aka fresh pizza because the microwave does unfortunate things to pizza crust.
Liza helped cook Shabbat dinner for Hillel which was mildly tortuous. She had to hang around salad and homemade hummus and fried schnitzel for two hours and couldn't eat it. Definitely not something we would recommend. This led to a solid 30 seconds of regret in its most pure form as we walked up the dining hall stairs with the knowledge that the only thing we had to look forward to was a piece of average pizza. But then we took a bite and remembered that pizza is like...So good.
Today’s Totals: Liza had four slices and Rachel had five.
Day 3
Mood: Powering Through
Okay, so we officially made it to Day 3 feeling like complete pizza pros. Our initial morning plan was to sleep in cause how else do you do a Saturday morning?
Once we awoke from the dead, we planned to walk over to the dining hall where we would grab a slice of pizza to hold us over until we could order from Luca's for dinner. Sounds like a perfectly cheesy Saturday, right?
Warning: what actually occurred might make you feel as though you have walked into a pizza nightmare.
We walked into the dining hall at 11:30 am and there was no pizza in sight. So since we had already swiped in, we figured we’d sit and stay awhile on the off chance that maybe the pizza gods would bless us with a slice. Nope. After sitting and watching everyone else eat for a solid 30 mins, nothing.
So we decided to leave with empty stomachs and distract ourselves with some Union Rugby because we’re #sporty. After the game, we tried the dining hall again with our fingers-crossed and all the hope two pizza-lovin’ friends could muster up, but they unfortunately let us down again. Still no pizza in sight. We finally realized that the only thing we could do was order our dinner pizza a little early, so running on water, we stuffed our faces with all the spinach, tomato and feta pizza our small stomachs could handle.
Today’s Totals: Liza and Rachel both had four slices.
Day 4
Mood: Dreamin’ Bout Omelettes
We woke up and it was once again a gym day on the Rachel and Liza Three Days A Week Gym Schedule (Minimal Effort Required). So we once again headed to the gym before any cheesy or saucy nutrients—we hadn’t learned from our mistakes. It was rough. Not as fun as sitting around eating pizza all day, we can tell you that.
So after that we both grabbed a few slices of leftover Luca's and munched as we homework-ed (yep, just made that a verb). Then it was time for a long awaited pizza photoshoot, because pics or it didn’t happen—the only motto we live by.
Then, once again, we tried the dining hall for pizza and they did indeed come through with pizza galore. But it was hard to be content with our singular slices of pizza while our friends continued to taunt us with cupcakes, pie and everything that we couldn’t even look at cause it all shimmered with perfection.
In fear that we might be hungry later, we grabbed some slices to go and headed home. PSA: dining hall pizza doesn’t look super appealing in the dining hall to begin with, but it looks worse back at the dorm. That was a no go.
Today’s Totals: Rachel had four slices and Liza had three.
Day 5
Mood: We Don’t Want Pizza
We woke up early to do work with high spirits. Liza got hungry and decided to reheat her piece of dining hall pizza around 9:30 am, but only ate half of it before she took a bite and had to spit it out. (@ Liza’s tastebuds: we are so, so sorry.)
Then it was off to class. Post knowledge-soaking we headed to the dining hall to grab our last pizza lunch for a long long time. Gotta say, we felt like total campus celebs cause whenever our friends or fellow Spoonies saw us, we were questioned on how the process was going. (Our answer by this point: we are ready for not pizza.) Then it was back to class for the afternoon because, once again, we are not in college simply to eat pizza.
Finally came dinner. Our final hurrah. We were excited, to say the least.
Today’s Totals: Rachel had four slices and Liza had three and a half.
Final Thoughts
Mood: #Blessed
Brunch is always great, but somehow today our omelettes from Peter Pause were a literal blessing from the gods.
Even though this was an experiment that drew quite a lot of attention amongst our friends, we didn’t feel a whole lot different from when we ate our normal diets.
Of course, we had those occasional moments where we couldn’t even look at pizza, but now that we’ve gone a day with real food again, it wouldn’t be that bad to have another slice.