Congress has finally come together to debate on a pressing issue affecting American citizens of all ages across the nation: whether or not they should declare pizza a vegetable. Cue the applause, college students rejoice.
Following the announcement, five more of our favorite gluttonous foods have been included into the debate and have just been declared a part of a healthy, balanced diet. Break out your napkins, prepare your sweet tooth and get ready for bikini season with these new super foods.
1. French Fries
French fries for a balanced meal sounds like a dream come true. Slice up those starchy white potatoes, dunk them in some bubbly oil and top them off with some ooey gooey calcium-rich cheese. Trans fats are healthy fats, right?
2. Chicken Nuggets
These little breaded pieces of chicken aren’t just for children anymore. Now we can finally consider them an excellent source of carbohydrates and protein. Just as long as you don’t mind the occasional processed, unidentifiable piece of meat.
3. Peanut M&Ms
Who doesn’t love some good ‘ole chocolate covered in an artificially colored sugar coating? Well, pop some peanuts inside the famous M&M candies and you have yourself a hearty snack. Peanuts are full of protein, antioxidants and heart-healthy fats.
Disclaimer: this particular study snack comes with a free ride on your own blood sugar roller coaster. Hold on tight.
4. Apple Jacks and Fruit Loops
A balanced breakfast is essential to a healthy life. Typically, a balanced breakfast consists of hearty fiber, lean protein and complex carbohydrates. Now sugary cereals can join in the fun.
Pour yourself a big bowl of Apple Jacks or Fruit Loops and you have yourself a serving (or two, or three) of carbohydrates and fruit. An apple a day keeps the doctor away and Apple Jacks count, right?
5. Green 3 Food Dye
This nifty little food dye can make anything green. Add a few droplets to your daily glass of milk, color your eggs and drip a little in your milkshakes. Walah, you’ve just “greenified” your diet. No more kale trends or green juices for you.
Need some meal ideas for your new “balanced” diet? Check out these gluttonous recipes: