St. Patrick's Day is a day when people who are less than one percent suddenly become full-blown Irish. It's also a day when green beer is a thing. But really, not everything looks the best dyed green. Instead of discovering that your green meal looks disgusting, check out these tips of what you should and shouldn't dye green this St. Patrick's Day.
GREEN BEER. (Green pee, though? Stay tuned, I'll let you know.) Seriously, beer is beer, and we don't care about the color. Especially after we had a few.
Shouldn't: Scrambled Eggs
Let's be real, doctors don't always get it right. Green eggs and ham are not very appealing, Dr. Seuss.
Probably the easiest thing to dye green is cake. Add it into your batter and when it comes out it'll be as green as Irish soil.
Shouldn't: Your Fingers
I'm looking at you, Chrissy Teigen.
Should: Rice Krispies Treats
Easy to make, easy to eat and doesn't look disgusting green. Learn how to make them here.
I mean, I get it, but it doesn't actually turn out green. Don't do it, man, just don't do it. Waffles should only be one color: waffle color.
Should: Ice Cream/Milkshakes
Green Shamrock Shakes for the win.
Shouldn't: Mashed Potatoes
I feel like we all need to publicly apologize to potatoes for the mistreatment. You look like guacamole, not the buttery goddess you really are.
Should: Chicago River
Fun fact: The powder they add to the water is actually orange, but turns green on impact. They've been dumping about 40 pounds of environmentally safe powder into the river each year since 1962.
Shouldn't: Your Pets
Repeat after me, I will not dye my pets different colors for the sake of an Instagram picture. It can be harmful to your pet, so please be careful when dyeing their hair. Let their natural colors shine and their lives be long and chemical free. But if you still want to, please be smart because dog skin is different from human skin and normal hair dye could be uncomfortable for them. Instead of using hair dye, use that remaining food coloring that you didn't put in your beer and color your dog with it. It's suggested to use an organic food coloring that has less artificial colors. Simply mix the food coloring with water and put in a spray bottle and spray your furry friend down. Dry off and you got yourself a colored pup. It's safe, harmless and can be washed out.
Wear your green, drink lots of green beer and tell that guy yelling in the bar about "how Irish he is" to póg mo thóin (kiss my ass).