Cutthroat Kitchen is the perfect combination of ruthless contestants, ridiculous sabotage, and Alton Brown. Add your favorite glass of wine or choice of mixed drink and you have one hour of ingenious back-stabbery with a side of blacking out. What more could you want in a cooking show?

Drink every time:

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  • A contestant forgets a main ingredient in the pantry – Everyone drinks once to make up for that contestant’s stupidity.
  • Alton Brown laughs maniacally or does something weird – Take a small sip when this happens or else a trip to the hospital may or may not be in the near future.
  • Alton Brown annoys you – See above.
  • A contestant starts off the bid at more than $3000 – Everyone waterfalls because these bids are escalating real quick.
  • A contestant gets all of his or her cooking utensils taken away – Everyone drinks once.
  • A contestant thanks another contestant for giving him or her a sabotage – Everyone drinks twice in honor of sass.
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  • A contestant deliberately sabotages another chef for revenge – Everyone drinks twice in honor of ruthlessness.
  • Alton laughs at someone for almost not making it out of the pantry – Everyone drinks for every chuckle Alton gives.

Chug your drink if:

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  • A contestant talks about what they could’ve made if they hadn’t been sabotaged – Everyone chugs and rolls their eyes because that’s the point of the fucking game.
  • A contestant says he or she is bidding just to drive up the price – Everyone refills their drink if this contestant ends up winning the bid at a ridiculously high price.
  • A contestant says he or she is going to let the others battle it out in the auction – Everyone chugs until the auction is over.
  • A chef with no sabotages is eliminated – Everyone chugs for the poor and probably unqualified contestant.
  • One of the sabotages involves a breakfast sandwich maker – Everyone chugs even though breakfast sandwich makers are awesome.

Take a shot if:

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  • If someone actually gets caught in the pantry *cue Alton’s maniacal laughter*
  • A contestant creates a “deconstructed” version of the dish
  • A contestant spends more than half of their money in the first round
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Happy sabotaging!