Recall your first few weeks as a first-year: you head into Hubbell with literally everyone in your FYS, eagerly swipe and exploit your newfound freedom to replace vegetables with ice cream for every meal. Without a doubt, your first couple of appearances at Hubbell were blunder-filled.
Now that the year is almost over, you probably think that you’ve mastered Hubbell—but here’s where you’re wrong. Here are 5 unspoken rules that I know you’ve broken in the last week.
1. Unless you want spit in your food, get off your phone while you order.
I know this sounds like something your grandma would say, but she’s actually on to something when it comes to Hubbell. We all know that the line for the build-your-own PB&J station is crazy-long, so help your peers out by telling the chef your order instead of tweeting about that sweet and sticky experience you’re about to have.
Seriously, your tweet or text can wait. Put down your phone, and grab your food. It’s that simple.
2. Chat at the table, not by the drink station.
I’m all about chatting it up with that cute guy in your Bio 013 lecture, but letting the 4,998 other students eat dinner is probably more important than the ten minute conversation you’re having with him. Try not to have that conversation right in front of the drink station; instead, take it to the table.
Hubbell tends to get busy quickly with people zooming in and out between classes. Next time, avoid the claustrophobic traffic jam by grabbing your drink and continuing your Hubbell date at the table.
3. Find your inner Mazerunner… or, just don’t leave backpacks in the aisles.
Navigating the maze of chaotically strewn tables and chairs in the dining room area while carrying books, plates and dessert (can’t forget that) can be a serious struggle. As soon as you think you’re in the clear, you trip over an oversized backpack and spaghetti sauce goes flying. You make it to the table okay, but we can all hear you swearing under your breath.
Running to Hubbell on your 15 minute lunch break surely is a feat, but make sure to put your backpack underneath the table rather than beside your seat. Although it’s not going to make you the athlete you aspire to be, it’ll make your trip to the table much less accident-prone.
4. Pro tip: No more searching for silverware!
When stuck in the midst of the Hubbell rush, you’ll probably be hard-pressed to find the silverware you need. Usually the first to go are the forks near the food stations—arguably the only type of silverware you really need at Hubbell.
Instead of wandering around aimlessly looking for the silverware you need, use this simple trick: the food stations have shelves about a quarter of the way down that contain bundles of forks, knifes, spoons and soup spoons. Usually these hidden places go unchecked for silverware since they are not at eye level, and you’ll be able to make a quick getaway in order to get your favorite seat in Hubbell.
5. Add a little nostalgia to your day, and play Hubbell Jenga.
Hubbell is charming, simply because you’re treated to food and a game: Hubbell Jenga. For those of you that don’t know, Hubbell Jenga is when the conveyor belt for dirty dishes is so overloaded that you’re forced to find a place where you can put your plate and cup without knocking over previously stacked dishes.
The best way to handle this situation is to have your plates pre-stacked, cup empty and silverware in your other hand. Once at the conveyor belt, send your silverware down the chute first that way both hands are free. Cups have the option to be stacked inside other cups (Solo cup-style) or balanced on larger stacks of plates.
The prize for winning Hubbell Jenga? A year’s worth of thankful peers.
Going to Hubbell can be a trying experience especially for underclassmen, but once you learn these 5 unspoken rules, you’ll be pleasantly mistaken for wise and experienced senior.
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