October is all about pumpkin-spiced everything, December is peppermint this and peppermint that. But it when it comes to November there seems to be no boundaries.
From pumpkin-pie fortune cookies to roasted turkey Doritos, these foods are sure to put you in a food coma. And not the good kind.
Pumpkin-Pie Fortune Cookies
Available online, for $1.25 per cookie and a minimum order of 50 cookies, you can have your very own batch of pumpkin-pie flavored fortune cookies covered in your choice of milk, dark, white, or assorted chocolates.
Feel free to add sprinkles while you’re at it — there’s a selection of over 15 designs. If you’re going to order this non-American treat to serve on an American holiday, you might as well add some fortunes such as, “I suggest you spit this out” or, “Forget turkey, where’s the lo mein?”
Thanksgiving Dinner… Soda?
If the meal itself isn’t enough for you, don’t worry, Jones Soda Co. has the drinks for you. In 2005, the company came out with a Limited Edition Holiday Pack that can now be found on Amazon, for $250.00…ya know, if 10-year old soda works for you. This set comes with flavors such as Turkey & Gravy, Mashed Potatoes & Butter, Green Bean Casserole, Cranberry Sauce, and Fruitcake.
Fortunately, this drink disaster has been retired, but a Limited Edition Pumpkin Pie 12-pack is on the market for $25.99 in 2015. My wish from the wishbone this year? That I won’t have to try this.
Roasted Turkey Doritos
Forget Cool Ranch and Nacho Cheese, Frito-Lay has Roasted Turkey Doritos for sale but only in… Taiwan? The concept seems a little off since Thanksgiving is an American holiday, and they’re shaped like Christmas trees. Doritos seems to be a little bit seasonally-confused, but whether it’s for Thanksgiving or Christmas, these chips should stay off the table.
Salt & Straw Caramel Thanksgiving Celebration Ice Cream
This take on a Thanksgiving dessert may not be what you’re taste buds are screaming for. With flavor choices such as Sweet Potato w. Maple Pecans, Buttered Mashed Potatoes and Gravy, Apple Cranberry Stuffing, Quince & Walnut Stuffing, Salted Caramel Thanksgiving Turkey, or Spiced Goat Cheese & Pumpkin Pie, Salt & Straw in Portland attempts to add the savory to your sweets. Do you put sprinkles on that? I’ll stick to chocolate or vanilla.
Pecan Pie Pringles
I’m not sure how you go from sweet dessert to salty snack, but Pringles seems to do it with their Pecan Pie flavored chip. Ironically, nuts don’t seem to appear anywhere on the ingredient list. They’re only available in season, since they are considered a limited edition chip, and preach that they’re the perfect Thanksgiving snack. After reading some reviews, you’d be nutty to want to try these.
Stick to the simple stuffing when it comes to stuffing yourself this year at the Thanksgiving table!