Thanksgiving is a time to be thankful for what you have: loving friends, family and the bountiful dinner table. However, as the holidays roll around so does your loud, dysfunctional family. Starting with your parents wanting to know about every second of your fall semester, to your crazy aunt who pries about your love life; Thanksgiving with your family is sure to be no short of an FBI interrogation.
"I need a drink."
There is the holiday phenomenon when family members, almost as a collective, say in the back of their minds, “I need a drink.” It is the moment in time in which each individual 21+ (but for real like 16+) family member realizes that they will not be able to survive the night without some form of alcohol in their bloodstream.
When this happens, that’s when the games will begin: fill your drink to the top of the glass.
“So, who’d you vote for?"
With the past year filled with political mayhem, this is the first major holiday post-presidential election. Politics are a definite no-no for holidays! Don’t let that one relative who instigates fights succeed in sparking a debate by asking a simple question.
For this question, a refill of your drink is needed; this is just the beginning of what will be a very long day.
“What you’re doing with your life?
Ah, the worst question known to man. This question trips everyone up but to a college student who has an existential crisis every other day, it’s a near death experience.
This question is sure to come at some point so be ready with a few shots near by because this ones sure to get you tipsy.
“Do you have someone to kiss on New Years?”
If you’re a chronically single person like I am, every year brings the “why don’t you have a boyfriend?” conversation. I have found that some of my favorite and funniest responses have been “because no ones good enough for me” or “because no one loves me” which will spark a wave of compliments, which is never a bad thing.
Just explain to your family that there's too much fabulous for someone else to handle right now and take a swig.
The Freshman 15
Whether or not you’re a freshman or have gained the 15 pounds, if it’s post-turkey, you’re probably going to have to loosen your belt a few notches. Your overly involved grandma will notoriously slide a snide, contradictory remark like, “There’s my little cubster, I made your favorite pecan pie recipe for dessert!”
Whether it's a blatant hit or a twisted compliment, you’re going to need to finish your drink for this one. Pair this one with an extra cookie; eat it while talking to the relative who made the remark and fault your curves.
But no matter the crazy and maybe slightly offensive comments made by your colorfully-languaged relatives, face it, there's no one else you'd rather sit around a dinner table with.