There’s no doubt that one of the best parts about going back to school is knowing that college football is finally here (and not just for the after parties… wink wink). When it comes to football there are three types of people: People that can actually watch the entire game, people that go for a few minutes for the insta, and people that watch from the comfort of their homes with a few friends all for the food.
To no one’s surprise, we at Spoon are the third kind of people.
So, with college football season upon us it is only right that we evaluate some of our favorite players on the field in the only way we know how… In terms of food. I mean, these two things basically go hand-in-hand, right?
1. Trevone Boykin (TCU): Kale
As one of the favorites to win the Heisman this year, Trevone Boykin and his fellow Horned Frogs are all the rage. Like kale, it seems as if Boykin broke into stardom suddenly and unexpectedly last year as he lead TCU to the Big 12 Championship and and the Peach Bowl title.
He has become a household name, just like how you can see a kale smoothie on almost any food instagram account. Boykin is certainly riding a [kale smoothie] wave straight to the top.
2. Kolby Listenbee (TCU): Chocolate Linguine
Kolby Listenbee brings a whole new level of diversity to the field. In addition to football, he is also a track and field athlete, so there is no surprise that he is one of the fastest players out on the field.
There seems to be no limit to what Listenbee can do and how versatile he can be, just check out this play from the Peach Bowl where the wide receiver turned into quarterback, just like this chocolate linguine turns dinner into dessert — neither of which should be underestimated.
3. Shawn Oakman (Baylor): Layer Dip
After nearly breaking the internet with all the memes that were made about his beastly appearance during the coin toss of the Cotton Bowl, there is no denying that Oakman is unstoppable on the field.
However, he isn’t just the “scary beast” that he was made out to be by the memes. In fact, he loves his pets and is known to walk his three bulldogs around Waco with him. There’s layers to Oakman, just like the layers in this dip — you never know what you might find.
4. Joey Bosa (Ohio State): Bacon
Fresh off Ohio State’s national championship, Bosa is ready to get back and defend that title. There is no doubt that his game last year was sizzlin’ like bacon (okay, okay, bad joke… I had to) and that he will be under even more pressure this year with NFL teams watching him more closely.
There’s no denying that after last year we all love some bacon, and we all love some Bosa — even Obama wanted in on the Bosa shrug.
5. Myles Garrett (Texas A&M): Avocado Toast
Myles Garrett burst onto the college football scene last year and there was no looking back as he shattered the SEC freshman sack record. Pretty similar to how spreading avocado on a piece of toast in a fancy way and posting it on Instagram seemed to become all the rage.
In both cases, it doesn’t seem as though there is any stopping in sight. Garrett is only adding new skills to his game, and people just keep adding new things on top of their avocado toast.
6. Jalen Ramsey (Florida State): World’s Most Expensive Burger
Yes, it is said that Jalen Ramsey is the best playmaking safety in college football, but it is also evident in this Instagram post that he has no problem with his confidence.
But, there is no doubt that his, “I’m the best, there is no one like me,” mentality is the same as that of the infamous $666 burger (that’s one big ego for a burger, huh?).
7. Duke Williams (Auburn): Sour Patch Kids
Auburn’s #1 returning receiver posted a string of tweets in May suggesting he might transfer out of Auburn, but don’t worry — soon after the tweets were deleted and coach Dameyune Craig tweeted that everything was “Gucci” between Auburn and Williams.
You know what they say, “First they’re sour, then they’re sweet.”
8. Christian Hackenberg (Penn State): Vanilla Latte
Just kidding, Hackenberg is a standout quarterback for Penn State and could possibly be the #1 pick in the 2016 NFL draft if all goes well. In fact, he might be just the kick of espresso that Penn State needs to finally make their team a contender.
9. Robert Nkemdiche (Ole Miss): Mac and Cheese
As a former #1 overall recruit, Nkemdiche has been progressing immensely over the years and should be ready to have a strong junior year. And with his adorable smiling picture from the 2014 Chick-Fil-A Bowl, he has become a family favorite.
5 kinds of cheeses, breadcrumbs on top, and maybe even a little bacon, this guy warms up the room with his smile just like some good ole comfort mac and cheese.
10. Kevin Wilkins (Rutgers): Candy Sushi
As a redshirted freshman, Kevin Wilkins may not have seen action on the field last season, but in a recent Rutgers Football dance-off, he certainly proved he has all the moves on the field this year.
Just like candy sushi, he’s not what you might expect. You may see just a big football player, but little do you know you’re getting the snap crackle and pop of rice krispies that can also do the worm (gummy worm, that is).