With February upon us, the holiday season is definitely over. *pulls out Kim K crying face* Luckily for you there are some pretty cool, and not so cool, food holidays so the season never has to end. Some food holidays are pretty weird; so weird that I’ve gotta wonder if they should really exist. Here’s a list of the weirdest food holidays throughout the year.
1. Gumdrop Day – February 15
Problems with gumdrops, besides the fact that there are better ways to candy:
1. They look like they taste good, but they’re actually really nasty.
2. They have a gross texture.
3. They’re sticky.
4. They get stuck in your teeth (see number 3).
2. Artichoke Heart Day – March 16
Does anyone eat artichoke hearts by themselves? Not with salad but just by themselves. Artichoke hearts do not deserve a holiday.
3. Licorice Day – April 12
As much as we all love strawberry Twizzlers, licorice is still a pretty terrible holiday. It’s the one day out of the year that you may have to eat black licorice (the devil’s candy). No thank you.
4. Fruit Cocktail Day – May 13
No one’s first choice of food is fruit cocktail. There are better ways to eat fruit that are also much healthier for you.
5. Fruit Compote Day – March 1
Fruit compote is really good…in other dishes. But I have never seen anyone eat it on its own.
6. Kitchen Klutzes of America Day – June 13
I’m just not sure why this holiday exists. Is it mocking kitchen klutzes or seeking to aid them? Either way, there is no actual food so it is not worth anyone’s time.
7. Mincemeat Day – October 26
Mincemeat is a mix of dried fruit, distilled alcohol, beef suet and beef or venison. It sounds like Rachel’s trifle from Friends. How did this become a thing?
8. Chocolate Wafer Day – July 3
Chocolate? Great. Chocolate Wafers? Bland. Also, all mentions of the word wafer give me Necco wafer flashbacks, which is enough to keep it from being a good holiday.
9. Mustard Day – August 5
Honestly not sure how mustard beat out Sriracha (which you can use in way more meals) in the food holiday draft. Dear mustard, calm down. You’re a condiment.
10. Hot Cross Bun Day – September 11
Don’t get me wrong, hot cross buns are great, but so not worth the flashbacks of playing “Hot Cross Buns” 5,000 times on the recorder. Nope.
11. Candied Orange Peel Day – May 4
Wait, wait, wait. There are people out there eating orange peels? Thumbs up for upcycling.
12. Bologna Day – October 24
My bologna has a first name it’s G-R-O-S-S. Sorry, but this is not a holiday; it’s a punishment.
13. Lemon Creme Day – November 29
Lemon creme is good but probs shouldn’t be eaten as its own meal.
14. Welsh Rabbit (Rarebit) Day – September 3
This holiday kind of creeps me out. Rarebit is a mixture of hot cheese and other sauces poured onto a piece of bread. To be fair, there is no actual rabbit in it. That doesn’t really matter because I still think of bunnies when this recipe is mentioned.
15. Noodle-Ring Day – December 11
Arguably the worst holiday of the year:
1. Someone put noodles in a bundt cake pan
2. It caught on
3. It caught on so much that it became a food holiday
I mean seriously.
16. Bicarbonate of Soda Day – December 30
Bicarbonate of soda is a leavening agent used in baking. Basically, it’s slightly different than baking soda. It seems strange to dedicate a whole day to almost baking soda.
17. Fig Newton Day – January 16
I didn’t even know they still made Fig Newtons. Can anyone give me a plausible explanation as to why they have their own holiday?
Egg Salad Week – the full week right after Easter Sunday of every year.
A lot of people (me) don’t like egg salad. Does it really deserve a whole week of celebration?
There are tons of other food holidays to enjoy. Celebrate them all; even the super weird ones.