November 8 will be a turning point. Whoever wins will start a new chapter in history. No matter who you vote for, this is the kind of election where you remember exactly where you were and what you were doing when it ended.
So eat! Eat good food that you will remember, and eat good food to cope with or celebrate whatever the results are.
If you're with her...
Hillary has been keeping fit on the campaign trail and watching her diet carefully (unfortunately part of this is due to the high standards for her appearance). She also loves spicy foods: she says hot peppers are like potato chips to her.
Though they’re a bit of an indulgence that she probably wouldn’t allow for herself on the campaign trail, she would definitely approve of their focus on equality. Because, as she says, “human rights are women’s rights, and women’s rights are human rights.” You definitely have the right to eat these brownies.
Because Hillary was an NYC senator, she has to be a fan of cheesecake. And these strawberries are the perfect portable snack for a busy (and nasty) woman.
Use all those leftover apples from that time you went overboard while apple-picking to make these simple and easy chips. It's Hillary in a snack: practical, smart, and mindful.
In honor of the millennials she gained due to Bernie's support. Also because an obsession with matcha is proven to make someone more relatable.
#SpoonTip: This recipe was originally for Halloween, but I would not recommend including the red food dye blood. That would be a little morbid for an election viewing.
Savor these sharp cupcakes as you watch Hillary (hopefully) continue to break the glass ceiling.
If you’re with Trump…
Let's be real: if you're really with Trump, you should just pick up some fast food to truly channel him. But if you're feeling fancy:
Crescent rolls are a lot easier for you to make great again than for the President to make America great again. The Prez has limited power because he can't bring policies to the table in the House and Senate. He can only persuade the members of the House and Senate to consider his stances on policies, which often requires going above the heads of the Congress to the American public.
With how divided the Congress and American people are along party lines, it’s become even more difficult for the president to convince either of them. Also, Trump has made many enemies inside the Republican party.
"He alone" can not change our country (for which some might be very thankful). But “you alone” (or with a friend) can revamp crescent rolls five ways to restore their greatness.
2) Monster Mix
(I'm totally unbiased...That's just the name of the mix.)
You obviously aren't scared of the possibility of Trump’s presidency, so throw it back to Halloween and mix together some leftover candy for a super unhealthy–yet admittedly delicious—trail mix.
I just feel like if Trump could choose to reincarnate as any food, he would choose to be these. These corndog muffins are "every adult child's dream come true." And I think if Trump woke up today as a corndog muffin, many dreams would be realized.
Because meatloaf is his favorite food.
You know why.
If you voted third party...
Uhhh…You might have a couple regrets. Even if you did it for your own conscience, you probably have some regrets. Just cry and eat lots of these candy desserts.
But if you're throwing a Gary Johnson viewing party, you may want to just let people make food for themselves (and possibly include some edibles?). If you're really into Jill Stein, you'd probably rather drown your tears in some vegan edamame dip.
As I said earlier, many polls show that the Democrat and Republican parties are getting increasingly polarized. Bring them together over a meal (with a parmesan, zucchini corn salad) on election night. Trump would approve because it would remind him of his hair; Hillary would approve because it’s healthy af.
Food can make even the worst things (i.e. politics) better. No matter what the election results are, do your part in pushing and voting for policies that move us toward a future where everyone's free to eat food that nourishes.Hopefully we can move towards a future that promotes respect for peoples' dignity and humanity, empowers previously marginalized and oppressed communities, and protects the environment.